I'm done.

[Black Power]

What I am getting from this so far is this:

Turbocharged Buick Regals > Women

 

[ncmalko1]

the Only Way A Marriage Will Work Is If Both Of You Have Seperate Hobbies. Every healthy Relationship Has That Dynamic. She Needs Her "alone" Time And You Need Yours.

 

[meanchicken]

Bi-polar = hereditary and one clinical step away from...can't spell the word but sounds like skit-so-fren-e-uh

If she aint on meds for it, you are always going to be one sneeze away from her going Mike Tyson on you and biting your ear off.

My first wife was bi-polar and refused treatment. I spent three years dodging that pendulum...and plates...and slaps upside my head.

Luckily we didn't have kids and we agreed we didn't belong together so we divorced and moved on.

If either one of you is holding the other one responsible for the others happiness...it's destined for dissapointment. You won't be able to make her happy and she won't be able to do it for you.
Adults have to be able to make themselves happy.

The more I learn about your situation, the more I think you need to consider the same fate for this marraige as I did for my first one.... rather than signing up for a kid. Stop that process now.

Good news about this thread is that if anyone else comes a long and does a search on gearhead marraige and family advice, they will get all our sound advice.

 

[Grimster]

I was literally weeks away from joining the Mormons last year (long story) but me being me I researched and dug into them and realized "holy **** these dudes are a bit nutty" so I ran away (going to a very ... contemporary Methodist church now that I like a LOT). I still have a couple mormon buddies but we don't ever talk religion. So I hear what you're saying and I understand 110%.

If the car doesn't please YOU sell the damn thing, it's a CAR, despite how some of us act (me included) it's just nuts and bolts and it's not a child or a wife or a thinking being, if YOU honestly don't enjoy it, sell it, get rid of the damned thing. No big deal.

If it's because the wife and life are kicking your ass, you might want to park it somewhere and let it sit a while, because reading all of this I'm still quite convinced, that car, that collection of nuts and bolts and metal and wire, is not your biggest problem. Still it's not like these are numbers matching Shelby Mustangs, they're still not that hard to find, sell the car if you think it'll help, you can buy one later, most likely. And heck with our economy as it is, you might buy one for LESS than you can now!

 

[lenc23]

hey vader you obviously need some cheering up so make sure to read the post JOKE OF THE DAY, you WILL feel better and i bet you even get a good idea for a nice valentines day gift for the mrs.

 

[GDNF2ET]

But lately she's been really cool. But once again its probably because I'm letting her have a kid and she's on good behavior.

Maybe she's been checking out your post on the board while your at work

 

[VadersV6]

Maybe she's been checking out your post on the board while your at work

Probably. Wouldnt be the first time. Theres the requesting forms from the phone company to show where I am at all times when each call is recieved or called out, every call I make, looking through all the texts on my phone, monitoring of every website I visit and reading all emails, having her uncle show up to my bachelor party to completely ruin it while she's having the time of her life in laughlin, nevada (8 years ago)..her uncle Tim is a famous ex skinhead who's been on Dr. Phil, Oprah...all over the place...he speaks at the museum of tolerance with a gay guy that he bashed like 20 years ago and now they get along, lol...he's renounced his skinhead ways and married a jewish girl...the movie american history X was a loose story based on his life...Tim Zaal...look him up...he ruined the whole thing for my friends, which is what mattered to me. I didnt need any hookers, strippers or crack pipes to have fun...before me, she was engaged to this guy who turned out was seeing and engaged to 5 other chicks and using them all for money. She found out, contacted all the other chicks, got them to her house then invited him over, then when he walked in the door, she knocked him out (california state champion in tae kwon do way back in the day)...so she has MAJOR trust issues and we've worked through all this to no avail. I dont have a porn problem, am not cheating now nor ever have..I talked **** about her to my cousin and she found out and FREAKED out until I reminded her how she's been talking **** about me behind my back to her family for years. When I found out she was monitoring me online, I found a site with links to a million nasty sites and started clicking away like mad...visited like 50 sites in 3 minutes....her inbox was pretty full, and she had alot to say, lol....had she done some real homework, she would have looked at the times and seen I was visiting like 15 sites a minute but she started telling her family I had a porn problem....totally backfired. Believe it or not, regardless of all the **** I talk, most all this stuff is behind us but I still harbor alot of anger. problem is that she was 19 when I met her and she had no life experience really to learn how to live and let live and drop the self righteous crap and talking **** about every person she meets behind their backs...total gossip hound.

 

[regal-nut]

Hay man i know the fealing it has taken me 10 years to get started on mine. You WILL know when it is time to start to work on it. Just do your self a faver DO NOT GET RID OF THE CAR!!!! It is hard to look at it sit there but just one thing to remember is if you get rid of your dreams you have given up on life.My wife tries to tell me to get rid of mine but i look at her and :smile: and tell her yoou know were the door is. there is 2 thing i told her 1 do not tell me to get rid of my guns. 2 and not to tell me to get rid of my cars. hope this helps:biggrin:

 

[Black Power]

In no way do I advocate attacking women, but somebody needs to beat her ass...make sure you have backup though, she sounds like her tae quon do might help her...

Good luck man, do what you need to do on the whole thing. I hope it works out for you.

 

[Jerryl]

Brent,

Sorry to hear brother.
Lots of good advice and only you know the right path.

A few things are for sure though:
- You can never make you wife happy.
- Your wife will most likely never be happy, which will make you misserable.
- If you get a child now, and something happens with your marriage, your wife can "legally" take you to the cleaners and laugh about it.
- A child is the absolute LAST thing you need right now. Step up and put your foot down! You will both pay the price, but the price is MUCH MUCH easier without kids. With kids, the price will lasts for generations!
- You are getting a child for all the WRONG reasons!
- You can not expect different results without any serious changes - You are at "The Crossroads".
- Without trust, there is no hope.

In Summary;
1. God First, ALWAYS!
2. YOUR health second!
3. Your family Third.
4. Your car fourth!

Time to be a bit selfish about your health and goals.
Trust in GOD, and I 'll keep praying for a miracle.

Edit:
Maybe GOD knows why you and your wife can not have kids.
Don't SCREW up HIS plan!

 

[SloGN]

Probably. Wouldnt be the first time. Theres the requesting forms from the phone company to show where I am at all times when each call is recieved or called out, every call I make, looking through all the texts on my phone, monitoring of every website I visit and reading all emails, having her uncle show up to my bachelor party to completely ruin it while she's having the time of her life in laughlin, nevada (8 years ago)..her uncle Tim is a famous ex skinhead who's been on Dr. Phil, Oprah...all over the place...he speaks at the museum of tolerance with a gay guy that he bashed like 20 years ago and now they get along, lol...he's renounced his skinhead ways and married a jewish girl...the movie american history X was a loose story based on his life...Tim Zaal...look him up...he ruined the whole thing for my friends, which is what mattered to me. I didnt need any hookers, strippers or crack pipes to have fun...before me, she was engaged to this guy who turned out was seeing and engaged to 5 other chicks and using them all for money. She found out, contacted all the other chicks, got them to her house then invited him over, then when he walked in the door, she knocked him out (california state champion in tae kwon do way back in the day)...so she has MAJOR trust issues and we've worked through all this to no avail. I dont have a porn problem, am not cheating now nor ever have..I talked **** about her to my cousin and she found out and FREAKED out until I reminded her how she's been talking **** about me behind my back to her family for years. When I found out she was monitoring me online, I found a site with links to a million nasty sites and started clicking away like mad...visited like 50 sites in 3 minutes....her inbox was pretty full, and she had alot to say, lol....had she done some real homework, she would have looked at the times and seen I was visiting like 15 sites a minute but she started telling her family I had a porn problem....totally backfired. Believe it or not, regardless of all the **** I talk, most all this stuff is behind us but I still harbor alot of anger. problem is that she was 19 when I met her and she had no life experience really to learn how to live and let live and drop the self righteous crap and talking **** about every person she meets behind their backs...total gossip hound.

WOW


I really think that you have gave her enough time to show that you care. But it seems kinda obvious that she is only thinking about herself and how other people veiw her as well. She must not really care about anything thing else in life but herself. I think you might need to spend sometime away from her to show her what all you do for her and maybe she will realize what she is about to push away with her selfish ways. hard knocks are one hell of a way to learn from things and you tend to see them very cleary afterwards 20/20.

 

[turbofabricator]

Read Walter Martins book "The Maze of Mormonism" Amazon.com: The Maze of Mormonism: Books: Walter Martin The book will, hopefully, shine some light on her beliefs. Look into Ed Decker, too. What you read in Mr. Martins book will Scare the crud right out of you. If you can get your wife to read it, all the better. BUT...........She will not like to hear what the book says. Ed Decker can help you in ways you couldn't believe possible. Check him out. Ever wanted to know exactly what Ed Decker and Saints Alive in Jesus believes

Life is tough. Good luck.

 

[84BuickGNYorkPA]

It's your life....

You have to be true to yourself, don't take anyone's advice, take your own advice, it's your life. But just be aware that life is like a merry go round, except this merry go round only goes around one time. Then that's it, the ride is over, it's your life and it will be a short one, ask any of us that have been here for awhile.
I met a wonderful girl, got married, five years later started a family, 6yrs later (and three boys) she comes home one day and says, "I want to find my soul mate" . I should have paid attention to the little red flags that where popping up, which I might add sound a lot like yours, she was the center of attention and with a big smile could usually get her own way.
Today I do what I want to do, when I want to do it, I will never let myself be controlled again by the power of the *ussy. Also having three children I only bring home half a paycheck, not complaining just a reality check. Dude we where in love and it went bad, the kids add so much more stress to a relationship, many, many responsibility's, make sure that you are both ready to be a parent, there is no turning back once you go down that road. Although when the time is right, I highly recomend being a parent, there is nothing in this world that I would rather do then hang out with my boys at a race track watching all of our buddy's race there buicks down the 1/4 mile. One last thought,
Fact:
If you adopt/father a child and things don't work out, you will pay untill that child becomes 18.
Good Luck with YOUR choices, it's your life,

Chuck

 

[mazdatech78]

The more I read about your situation the worse I feel for ya. Im not one for giving advice when it comes to some dudes wife. Car and motorcycle yes, but I usually dont get involved in putting my .02 cents into someones marrage. But, since you put it out for us to read, here is my nickles worth of free advice. RUN, not walk to the best divorce attorney you can afford. Sell your car to you best friend to hold until the divorce is over. And please, for the love of God, do not adopt that poor kid. If he needs adopted his life has probably been hard enough. Dont subject him to your wife. I dont know you or your wife from Adam but if what you have posted here is true. She and her entire family are f*cking nuts! And unless you are crazy too, why would you even think about sticking around. There are so many normal women out there that are looking for a normal guy, why bother w/ the crazies? Ive dated my fair share and have been punched, kicked, gouged, sh*t thrown at me, and even almost stabbed by a crazy girlfriend. And now I look back and think to myself, WTF was I thinking, no p*ssy is worth that...NONE! But my friend, its your life, and you have to make the tough choices in it. I hope for your sake that you make the right one that works out for ya. Take care.

James

 

[Junior Samples]

Brent,

Right now you can walk away with no ties, once you bring a kid into the equation... dude your hit
Id go tell that
Bi-polarjewishmormanprofessionalactingskinheadkaratechampKGBspy
family to take a leap...I know whats gonna happen when you let her get that kid...she'll hold it over your head during every battle...
"I'll take this baby! and you'll be paying for it!"

i can hear it now

Man, SO CAL is way too complicated for me

 

[meanchicken]

Brent,

Right now you can walk away with no ties, once you bring a kid into the equation... dude your hit
Id go tell that
Bi-polarjewishmormanprofessionalactingskinheadkaratechampKGBspy
family to take a leap...I know whats gonna happen when you let her get that kid...she'll hold it over your head during every battle...
"I'll take this baby! and you'll be paying for it!"

i can hear it now

Man, SO CAL is way too complicated for me

Amen bruddah Mike.

My first wife was bipolar...
Bipolar folks are one clinical step from skitzo, so I agree...run away and don't drag a kid into this mayhem.

Tim

 

[rodman99999]

The more I read about your situation the worse I feel for ya. Im not one for giving advice when it comes to some dudes wife. Car and motorcycle yes, but I usually dont get involved in putting my .02 cents into someones marrage. But, since you put it out for us to read, here is my nickles worth of free advice. RUN, not walk to the best divorce attorney you can afford. Sell your car to you best friend to hold until the divorce is over. And please, for the love of God, do not adopt that poor kid. If he needs adopted his life has probably been hard enough. Dont subject him to your wife. I dont know you or your wife from Adam but if what you have posted here is true. She and her entire family are f*cking nuts! And unless you are crazy too, why would you even think about sticking around. There are so many normal women out there that are looking for a normal guy, why bother w/ the crazies? Ive dated my fair share and have been punched, kicked, gouged, sh*t thrown at me, and even almost stabbed by a crazy girlfriend. And now I look back and think to myself, WTF was I thinking, no p*ssy is worth that...NONE! But my friend, its your life, and you have to make the tough choices in it. I hope for your sake that you make the right one that works out for ya. Take care.

James

Earlier I wrote something about not walking out if there was anything in the relationship worth redeeming. After reading what you've said since then: I take all that back!! What this guy said: +1!!

 

[87GNSteve]

Earlier I wrote something about not walking out if there was anything in the relationship worth redeeming. After reading what you've said since then: I take all that back!! What this guy said: +1!!

Me too.

I say Abandon ship.

The reason I'm still single is my ZERO tolerance for BS and the inability to be manipulated. I had good role models --Dad and Grand Pa.:biggrin:

 

[VadersV6]

I sent out a PM to a Mod to erase this thread and nothings happened yet...
Someone nuke it please

 

[meanchicken]

Uh oh....is the wife onto us?
Crap.
Hope she doesn't start making the rounds and kicking all our butts now....
I'm putting my helmet on.