Some of you may have known my wife was due to give birth to our 2nd child, a baby boy. I usually don't type these types of posts up as I'd rather deal with personal issues myself but in fairness to all I'll talk...I'll try to make a long sad story short. Wife started having contractions Wed. night but was only 4 cm so she was sent home. (they want you to be 5 cm before they'll work w/you) The contractions became more intense Thurs. afternoon so we went back to the ER...she was almost 5 cm and they decided to send her to the maternity ward. The baby had a good heart beat of 160. Later in the evening they put in the epidural and pitocin. A few hours elapsed. Then as my wife's contractions got more intense the baby's heart beat would drop down to 40, then back up to 100 then back to 40-50ish range. Sometime after 2:00 AM CST they sent my wife to the OR while I waited outside. My son was born this morning at 2:21 AM CST via an emergency c section without a heart beat. They tried to revive him with a tube down his throat and performing chest compressions but at 2:51 AM CST he was pronounced dead. We do not know why he died. He was said to be a healthy boy and none of the docs can give us an answer. We're having an autopsy done and also we hare going to allow him to be an organ donor for other babies. Let me tell you this is the hardest thing I've ever faced. I've lost the will to do much of anything as I sit and grieve. I wonder why my wife and I were so wrongfully cheated of our son. It's been all I can do to not break down this entire day. As a result I've not slept, have not eaten much and just have been really low. If any of you have ever lost a child at such a young age you know where I'm coming from. The sad part is he never got a chance at life. He was a really beautiful boy, with a head full of hair and just as precious as can be. We got a few pics of us holding him and a professional photographer has also shot some photos for us as a memorial. After he died I wanted to go home and get my 2.5 year old daughter out of bed and hold her. When I came home the next morning to pick up my niece who has been babysitting our daughter thru this, my daughter wanted me to pick her up and hold her...buddy if I didn't spend the next 25 minutes holding her. Please go hug your children and give them all the love you can. Sorry about this. I need to take a break from here and grieve with my family and get everything settled down. I'll be back as soon as I can get myself together. Thankfully my family, friends of my wife and my whole squadron are helping us out.