Just went to look for an apartment for the daughter for college and just found out she is like 4 months pregnantIm pulling my hair out she is 19 and her boyfriend works for GM as a apprentice mechanic and is not finacialy secure.We decided to keep her enrolled in college and see where it takes us but she is not sure about keeping the baby or adoption.Anyone else have input or experiences like this thanks John{ lost 10 lbs worrying}
teenage woes
- Thread starter shawnz
- Start date
freedom of choice.
if she had that baby her life will completely change forever, she may not even make it through college, she is wayy to damn young to have a baby, did you not tell her about contraception, in my opinion, she should terminate the preagnancy in the long run she will be happy she did, with the way the economy is and the cost of living it is not worth bringing a baby into this world, unless of course the grandparents take care of it, which mean (you buddy).. think carefully and i hope she does the right thing.
if she had that baby her life will completely change forever, she may not even make it through college, she is wayy to damn young to have a baby, did you not tell her about contraception, in my opinion, she should terminate the preagnancy in the long run she will be happy she did, with the way the economy is and the cost of living it is not worth bringing a baby into this world, unless of course the grandparents take care of it, which mean (you buddy).. think carefully and i hope she does the right thing.
Re: freedom of choice.
I usually don't like to get caught up in controversial threads on the internet--but this is THE WORST advice i think i have ever read on a BB.
To the gentleman in the original post.-----I am 10 months ahead of you and your situation.My daughter is 19(20 in 2 months)--and has a 5 month old daughter.She was going to college when this happened and her boyfriend was not settled either.My daughter has had to grow up a tremendous amount in the last year.She now works(30 hours a week),goes to school,and raises her daughter--yes--with our help.Everytime i see my beautiful granddaughter i could NOT imagine it any other way.
Has it been a sacrifice for our family---absolutely
Was i dissapointed in my daughter and the situation-----you bet
Bottom line for me-----everytime i look at the 5 month old--i just melt--i wouldn't change a thing.
Good luck with your situation.
Geoff
I usually don't like to get caught up in controversial threads on the internet--but this is THE WORST advice i think i have ever read on a BB.
To the gentleman in the original post.-----I am 10 months ahead of you and your situation.My daughter is 19(20 in 2 months)--and has a 5 month old daughter.She was going to college when this happened and her boyfriend was not settled either.My daughter has had to grow up a tremendous amount in the last year.She now works(30 hours a week),goes to school,and raises her daughter--yes--with our help.Everytime i see my beautiful granddaughter i could NOT imagine it any other way.
Has it been a sacrifice for our family---absolutely
Was i dissapointed in my daughter and the situation-----you bet
Bottom line for me-----everytime i look at the 5 month old--i just melt--i wouldn't change a thing.
Good luck with your situation.
Geoff
every parents nightmare, thats a tough call, it all comes down to her goals, and your ammount of help. if you feel that you wuld help with babysitting, and her completing college is a must, then keeping the baby is an option, but when the day is done its her life, 19 is one year old enough to make your own decisions, and if your mature enough to have sex and make a baby, then you have to reap what you soe, personally when i was her age, me andmy stead girlfriend were really careful, antibiotics can mess with hormone birthcontrol, missed doses and so forth, and there is always the chance that with all modern science, you mess it up, if i was 19 i would do the unpopulat thing, but she is in her 2nd trimester, and window for termination is closing fast, adoption is a tough one, being she is able to take care of the kid, and the thoughts of a profitable life vs the mabe not so profitable life, or not so easy profitable life, thats not enough in my mind to turnmy baby over to someone else, i am the most open minded person you will meet, and weigh all options, but the biggest thing here is that time that she waited to tell, and to start making decisions, sounds like the family needs to have a sit down TONIGHT and talk numbers, involvement, and tough choices, and then you neet to see a doctor monday, cause either way, the mother needs to be checked out to ensue that everything is ok, and, if the decision is to make the tough call, and do what no one wants to do, but sometimes must, then the doctor can help you also, thats how i see it, good luck
Grant
Grant
From personal experience... I know about a dozen girls/couples that went thru this at that age.
Those who kept the baby are NOT well off whatsoever, & to be honest have amounted to nothing in the past 5-6 years.
Im close friends with 4 girls who aborted, continued on with school, and ALL 4 are doing very well for themselves.
Im not on a pro-life trip here... just stating what I've witnessed.
Shoot... I have trouble balancing full time job & part time school!!
Those who kept the baby are NOT well off whatsoever, & to be honest have amounted to nothing in the past 5-6 years.
Im close friends with 4 girls who aborted, continued on with school, and ALL 4 are doing very well for themselves.
Im not on a pro-life trip here... just stating what I've witnessed.
Shoot... I have trouble balancing full time job & part time school!!
Well, my wife and I are trying very hard (unsuccessfully) to have a child, and if your daughter doesn't want it, we would love to have it. My wife lost her (unborn) daughter in a bad traffic accident 12 years ago and we are looking to adopt a child. There is no need to abort a baby when there are childless couples who would love to have a little baby and I would be willing to pay any of your daughters medical bills that come up. 
Jack Evers
Member
- Joined
- May 24, 2001
These young women are 19..not 15. Come on, now, what's the big disaster? To say their life is ruined is nonsence and to suggest abortion is an abomination.
Listen to "ghall"l, he's been through it. To say these young women that have had children "have amounted to nothing" is perhaps one person's opinion and only that.
Does raising kids cost money..you bet. Could raising a child "cramp your style?" I suppose. Is there anything more important than our children? Could be, but I haven't figured out what in my many years.
Celebrate your grandchild! Love your daughter and her baby. Things will work out for the best.
Listen to "ghall"l, he's been through it. To say these young women that have had children "have amounted to nothing" is perhaps one person's opinion and only that.
Does raising kids cost money..you bet. Could raising a child "cramp your style?" I suppose. Is there anything more important than our children? Could be, but I haven't figured out what in my many years.
Celebrate your grandchild! Love your daughter and her baby. Things will work out for the best.
This drew me out of the woodwork as well...
I met my wife when she was 18, living on her own, and going to school. That summer, she got pregnant. I was older (23) but I was in college, flat broke, and definitely didn't intend to start a family! Abortion was never a consideration for either of us and now, 14 years later, we are still married and have two amazing daughters.
This was right before the first Gulf war and I was given orders to the Gulf (later cancelled). I hadn't enrolled in school for the following term due to my recall and when they cancelled my orders, I was in a pickle. I'm not sure what the odds are on successful outcomes in such situations: young, expecting, broke, jobless, homeless.
Those first few years were tough; we lived in a trailer on a farm outside of town. I made a water bed out of pine 2x10s so we'd have a place to sleep. I worked 40 hours a week and went to engineering school. I look back on those years now though and wouldn't change a thing. Sure, things were tight, but we had friends and we had fun, even when we were eating left over pizza from work...although I still hate pizza!
The decision will be your daughter's and yours. Just remember, with your support and some determination on the couple's part, raising a child can be a beautiful thing, no matter where you start.
I met my wife when she was 18, living on her own, and going to school. That summer, she got pregnant. I was older (23) but I was in college, flat broke, and definitely didn't intend to start a family! Abortion was never a consideration for either of us and now, 14 years later, we are still married and have two amazing daughters.
This was right before the first Gulf war and I was given orders to the Gulf (later cancelled). I hadn't enrolled in school for the following term due to my recall and when they cancelled my orders, I was in a pickle. I'm not sure what the odds are on successful outcomes in such situations: young, expecting, broke, jobless, homeless.
Those first few years were tough; we lived in a trailer on a farm outside of town. I made a water bed out of pine 2x10s so we'd have a place to sleep. I worked 40 hours a week and went to engineering school. I look back on those years now though and wouldn't change a thing. Sure, things were tight, but we had friends and we had fun, even when we were eating left over pizza from work...although I still hate pizza!
The decision will be your daughter's and yours. Just remember, with your support and some determination on the couple's part, raising a child can be a beautiful thing, no matter where you start.
hey all im going to say is the post about sitting down and coming up with a plan of attack was the best addvice you could get i was in the same problem with my ex wife i was a e-nothing in the army and had to work a second job to make it through the hard times and the members that are on here that spent time in the service can tell you thats not the easist thing to do but i got it done and know i have two boys that i would not trade the world for but you guys do have to sit down and talk this out and make sure you gauge the boyfriend real good your a dad so i know you have the skill to pick out a loser a mile away but please try everything you can before you think about abortion i know its the mothers choice but please remeber the men and wemon that gave there lives so your daughter can have on just my two and ahalf cents
Consider adoption if she isn't old enough or have the means to care for it and still fulfill her dreams. Like was mentioned, there are many couples whose dreams would be fulfilled to have the baby.
My girlfriend works with a woman who is nearly 40 whose daughter she gave up recently contacted her. Both are very happy for the chance to meet apparently. It could have been different....
All this from a pro-choicer......the decision has to be right. 4 months is too late to be doing anything to the baby anyway.
My girlfriend works with a woman who is nearly 40 whose daughter she gave up recently contacted her. Both are very happy for the chance to meet apparently. It could have been different....
All this from a pro-choicer......the decision has to be right. 4 months is too late to be doing anything to the baby anyway.
I'm sorry to hear that you are having this problem. A lot of difficult choices lay ahead for your daughter. She will certainly need a lot of support from you no matter what her choice will be. She needs to keep in mind that she will not be able to fulfill her dreams if she wants to keep the baby. That is just the sad truth! So she is going to make a decision that will influence the rest of her life, maybe she can live with the idea of being a mom and be happy about it that would be cool!
Terminating the pregnancy is a very hard choice to make but fortunately she has that choice and she should be made aware of that! Time is running out on that option. Adoption is another, of course, but that will still halt her in her tracks not only for the 5 months ahead but also afterwards it will not be easy for her to deal with her feelings and the hormons in her body. But these are just my thoughts! I hope things will work out well for you and her!
Terminating the pregnancy is a very hard choice to make but fortunately she has that choice and she should be made aware of that! Time is running out on that option. Adoption is another, of course, but that will still halt her in her tracks not only for the 5 months ahead but also afterwards it will not be easy for her to deal with her feelings and the hormons in her body. But these are just my thoughts! I hope things will work out well for you and her!
hmmm lets talk about this..
option 1.
adoption- did you know that adoption is even harder than just terminating a preagnancy for the mother, not physically but mentally, once she sees that baby it will be even harder for her to let go, not to mention sometimes the babies once they grow up have to deal with the fact of trying to answer the question who my real parents are, i am not pro abortion or pro life this is a woman's decition she alone can make this decition for the best or for the worst.
number 2.
If you have having a problem having a baby, perhaps you should have married a woman who u knew could have them, not flaming anyone who's wife can have babies, at least for me when i marry i will make damn sure my wife can pump them out when needed, and if you are the one with the problem, there are other choices, you could call me and i will do the honors. also why dont you go down to the third world countries and adopt a child that lost her parents there are plenty of those around, S*** they are all over the place here, why wait for another one to be brought into this hell hole that we live in, give me a break.
number 3.
Termination of preagnancy is one of the safest procedure outthere and it only takes 5 minutes, of course that is you are that far advance in your preagnancy it make take longer but it is a very very safe procedure.
if i think of anything else i will be posting.
TA TA.
option 1.
adoption- did you know that adoption is even harder than just terminating a preagnancy for the mother, not physically but mentally, once she sees that baby it will be even harder for her to let go, not to mention sometimes the babies once they grow up have to deal with the fact of trying to answer the question who my real parents are, i am not pro abortion or pro life this is a woman's decition she alone can make this decition for the best or for the worst.
number 2.
If you have having a problem having a baby, perhaps you should have married a woman who u knew could have them, not flaming anyone who's wife can have babies, at least for me when i marry i will make damn sure my wife can pump them out when needed, and if you are the one with the problem, there are other choices, you could call me and i will do the honors
. also why dont you go down to the third world countries and adopt a child that lost her parents there are plenty of those around, S*** they are all over the place here, why wait for another one to be brought into this hell hole that we live in, give me a break.number 3.
Termination of preagnancy is one of the safest procedure outthere and it only takes 5 minutes, of course that is you are that far advance in your preagnancy it make take longer but it is a very very safe procedure.
if i think of anything else i will be posting.
TA TA.
Originally posted by wiked87gn
hmmm lets talk about this..
option 1.
adoption- did you know that adoption is even harder than just terminating a preagnancy for the mother, not physically but mentally, once she sees that baby it will be even harder for her to let go, not to mention sometimes the babies once they grow up have to deal with the fact of trying to answer the question who my real parents are, i am not pro abortion or pro life this is a woman's decition she alone can make this decition for the best or for the worst.
number 2.
If you have having a problem having a baby, perhaps you should have married a woman who u knew could have them, not flaming anyone who's wife can have babies, at least for me when i marry i will make damn sure my wife can pump them out when needed, and if you are the one with the problem, there are other choices, you could call me and i will do the honors
number 3.
Termination of preagnancy is one of the safest procedure outthere and it only takes 5 minutes, of course that is you are that far advance in your preagnancy it make take longer but it is a very very safe procedure.
if i think of anything else i will be posting.
TA TA.
I think you just won the contest for the stupidest post to ever find its way onto Turbobuick.com. Congratulations.
Originally posted by BlownZ
I think you just won the contest for the stupidest post to ever find its way onto Turbobuick.com. Congratulations.
Truth and facts hurt , nobody likes to hear the truth facts and consequenses and obviously you are one of them, are you a Mormon?
shawnz good luck to you and your kid, though times ahead keep your head up.
Originally posted by wiked87gn
Truth and facts hurt , nobody likes to hear the truth facts and consequenses and obviously you are one of them, are you a Mormon?
shawnz good luck to you and your kid, though times ahead keep your head up.
It would take too long and be too painful to try and educate you how stupid your post was...on so many different levels.
No I am not a mormon. It has nothing to do with your stance on abortion..that is an opinion. You are dumber on a much deeper level than that.
Another stupid post------this is EASILY the toughest mental question out there.I hope you don't listen to this moron!!!!!!!
His views are extreme and un-informed--please don't listen to this idiot.I spent 5 hours with my grandaughter yesterday---i am only 36----I URGE you to work this out as a family-------------this subject is near and dear to me--if you would like to IM me about my experiences---just do it----just please don't listen to this idiot!!!!!
Geoff
Jack Evers
Member
- Joined
- May 24, 2001
Originally posted by wiked87gn
hmmm lets talk about this..
number 2.
If you have having a problem having a baby, perhaps you should have married a woman who u knew could have them, not flaming anyone who's wife can have babies, at least for me when i marry i will make damn sure my wife can pump them out when needed, and if you are the one with the problem, there are other choices, you could call me and i will do the honors
I've been kind of waiting for cwelk87gn to respond to this comment, but I guess he's too much the gentleman. What a GD rotten thing to say in response to his remarks.
