THE 6 BEST SMART-ASS ANSWERS
SMART ASS ANSWER #6
> It was mealtime during a flight on American
> Airlines.
> 'Would you like dinner?' the flight attendant
> asked John, seated in front.
> 'What are my choices?' John asked.
> 'Yes or no,' she replied.
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #5
> A flight attendant was stationed at the
> departure gate to check tickets.
> As a man approached, she extended her hand for
> the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed
> her.
> Without missing a beat, she said, 'Sir, I need
> to see your ticket not your stub.'
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #4
> A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at
> the grocery store but she couldn't find one big
> enough for her family.
> She asked a stock boy, 'Do these turkeys get any
> bigger?'
> The stock boy replied, 'No ma'am, they're dead.'
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #3
> The cop got out of his car and the kid who was
> stopped for speeding rolled down his window.
> 'I've been waiting for you all day,' the cop
> said.
> The kid replied, 'Yeah, well I got here as fast
> as I could.'
> When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent
> the kid on his way without a ticket.
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #2
> A truck driver was driving along on the freeway.
> A sign comes up that reads, 'Low Bridge Ahead'.
> Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of
> him and he gets stuck under the bridge.
> Cars are backed up for miles.
> Finally, a police car comes up.
> The cop gets out of his car and wal ks to the
> truck driver, puts his h ands on his hips and says,
> 'Got stuck, huh?'
> The truck driver says, 'No, I was delivering
> this bridge and ran out of gas.'
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #1
> A college teacher reminds her class of
> tomorrow's final exam.
> 'Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you
> not being here tomorrow.
> I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious
> personal injury, illness, or a death in your
> immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses
> whatsoever!'
> A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised
> his hand and asked, 'What would you say if tomorrow
> I said I was suffering from complete and utter
> sexual exhaustion?'
> The entire class is reduced to laughter and
> snickering.
> When silence is restored, the teacher smiles
> knowingly at the student, shakes her head and
> sweetly says,
> 'Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with
> your other hand.'
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #6
> It was mealtime during a flight on American
> Airlines.
> 'Would you like dinner?' the flight attendant
> asked John, seated in front.
> 'What are my choices?' John asked.
> 'Yes or no,' she replied.
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #5
> A flight attendant was stationed at the
> departure gate to check tickets.
> As a man approached, she extended her hand for
> the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed
> her.
> Without missing a beat, she said, 'Sir, I need
> to see your ticket not your stub.'
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #4
> A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at
> the grocery store but she couldn't find one big
> enough for her family.
> She asked a stock boy, 'Do these turkeys get any
> bigger?'
> The stock boy replied, 'No ma'am, they're dead.'
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #3
> The cop got out of his car and the kid who was
> stopped for speeding rolled down his window.
> 'I've been waiting for you all day,' the cop
> said.
> The kid replied, 'Yeah, well I got here as fast
> as I could.'
> When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent
> the kid on his way without a ticket.
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #2
> A truck driver was driving along on the freeway.
> A sign comes up that reads, 'Low Bridge Ahead'.
> Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of
> him and he gets stuck under the bridge.
> Cars are backed up for miles.
> Finally, a police car comes up.
> The cop gets out of his car and wal ks to the
> truck driver, puts his h ands on his hips and says,
> 'Got stuck, huh?'
> The truck driver says, 'No, I was delivering
> this bridge and ran out of gas.'
>
SMART ASS ANSWER #1
> A college teacher reminds her class of
> tomorrow's final exam.
> 'Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you
> not being here tomorrow.
> I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious
> personal injury, illness, or a death in your
> immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses
> whatsoever!'
> A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised
> his hand and asked, 'What would you say if tomorrow
> I said I was suffering from complete and utter
> sexual exhaustion?'
> The entire class is reduced to laughter and
> snickering.
> When silence is restored, the teacher smiles
> knowingly at the student, shakes her head and
> sweetly says,
> 'Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with
> your other hand.'
>
