wife 1.0

[machinegun]

new revision.

Subject: Failed Upgrade
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Smoking 10.3, Boozing 2.5 and Saturday Night Pubs 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I cannot keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my other favorite applications like Night Club 4.3, Dance 'n' Drink 2.0, Bachelor Party 7.77 and Racing 3.8.

I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall does not work on this program. Once I tried to uninstall Wife 1.0 but got this error: "General Protection Fault in module House Security. The Uninstallation will abort." Can you help me, please?

Here was the reply from Tech Support:

Re: Failed Upgrade
This is a very common problem among men, but it is due mostly to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program. Wife 1.0 is actually an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run everything.

It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge Wife 1.0 from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under "Warnings-Alimony/Child Support;" this was given to you at time of registration with Wife 1.0. I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs).

The best course of action will be to enter the command C:APOLOGIZE. In fact I would suggest you use this command every time Wife 1.0 crashes on your system. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance.

Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Chocolates 5.0 or Movies 4.5.

Do not, under any circumstances, install Visual Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Recent surveys show add-ons like Visual Dress 2.0, Diamond Necklace 3.0, and A Quick Tour To Temple 1.0 are the best Third Party tools supported by Wife 1.0 to allow it to run smoothly and effectively.
Best of luck!

[WHEEZER]

I like it!

[Hacksaw]

Did you remember to upgrade your memory first?

I, and many other men, run into a problem where it doesn't matter if it's Wife version X.X, or Girlfriend X.X:

Does this happen to you Gents?

[machinegun]

Memory upgrades are not available for models over 20 years old. I have looked into this but only found memory add ons. These small devices plug into a serial port. Drivers and communications problems make them very unreliable. Have found that my OS does not seem to function well with other new fangled items. Again the age and OS version are now unsupported.

[galoush]

Try a hammer , worked great on my old computer when it was screwed up . Then i got a new one Wife thats another thing

[jdpolzin]

I just hope you don't get a virus from any XXX activity!!!

[machinegun]

I have too old of an OS to receive viruses, I think the developers can not compile oldfart code. It seems these developers have lost the ability to either convert oldfart into something more useful. I would loose some of my accessory applications. Spare Tire 8.2 and Gray Hair 4.4 rev d. Certain flat files such as enginebase, suspensionbase, drivingbase and canfixanythingbase do not convert well into new secure database engines. All this also hinges on 42 year old hardware technology which is having certain failures. EyeSlots need expansion adapters, Backplanes need external thermal controllers and certain actuators seem to need to be cleaned and lubed. Wish I could just be upgraded to a newer faster chassis but wife 1.0 would probably fail on any of those upgrades.